Emergency Nurses Week 2022

In 1990, the first time I stepped into a city hospital Emergency Department (ED) and saw nurses and doctors rushing by what I thought was a frenzied scene, I almost threw up and ran away back to the chronic care facility I came from. The noise from the monitors, the sirens wailing on the ramp, the ringing of the telephones, and the curses from the intoxicated patients.  “This is not my world,” or so I thought.

After one perceptive nurse noticed my pale face, she tapped my shoulder and made me sit by her side at the Ambulance Triage while I waited for the nurse recruiter to return from an urgent phone call. She gave me a glass of water and entertained me with funny stories about the ED. “You haven’t seen anything yet.”, she teased me in her slight Indian accent, “but you will love it here. And you will never leave Emergency Nursing.”

“Sanni” was absolutely right. It is difficult to believe that I survived thirty-two years in emergency nursing. And loved the hurly-burly and exciting life of an ER nurse. And appreciated my colleagues through the years.

Like an arrow to the heart, emergency nursing lodged itself in my heart refusing to let go despite the adversities. I loved the staff and even craved the chaos. I stayed at Elmhurst Hospital for 21 years. Then, I worked in other urban EDs where life was never placid, never dull, and the word “Quiet” jinxes everything. My stay at Maimonides Medical Center and Mount Sinai Morningside provided me with a plentitude of stories and a lifetime of memories that strengthened me more as a nurse and as a person.

Never did it occur to me to leave the scary world of emergency nursing. The nursing, medical and ancillary staff in the ED stood resilient through the vagaries of demands from the patients in agony and despair. It was a world with emotional rewards because we made a difference. My career brought me from the bedside to several leadership positions, and I can honestly say that I enjoyed leaving a legacy of hard work, integrity, and fairness, I try.

Then the Covid-19 pandemic wrought emotional scars that brought me to the crossroads of my career. I almost walked away from nursing. I was emotionally bruised from feeling helpless and staying strong was a challenge. My body was keeping score.

According to the book by Bessel van der Kolk, the effects of trauma affect the emotions, the mind, and the physical body. He described hypervigilance and hyperarousal as causing physical ailments manifesting in the bodies of those who continue to suffer under stress. The constant adrenaline rush was wearing me down. My body was definitely keeping score, and it was giving me dire warnings to slow down, maintain my work-life balance, and do my self-care.

Life presented many trials on top of all the stressors we suffered with Covid. Realizing that I have to love myself first, I gave myself time to heal. My worth as a nurse and as a person is not tied to the insincere approvals from anybody, but to the overwhelming support and love from those who matter: the nurses whom I work with.

In 2021, I published my book “ER Nurse: The Warrior Within,  Bruised but still standing". This year 2022, the Emergency Nurses Association is formally celebrating Emergency Nurses Week on October 9 through October 15. It seems surreal that this year’s theme is “Standing Strong”.

I looked back at the pictures I collected over the thirty-two years and I smile with pride for having worked with my sisters and brothers on the battlefields. There are many psychological land mines in this profession. We have survived the storms and we will continue to weather the unpredictable and unprecedented challenges that come our way.

I cherish the camaraderie with the staff. I remember the fun moments and the simple pleasures that lightened our load. I treasure the hugs after a difficult day. I celebrate the lives we have saved and the thanks from patients and families for whom we made a difference. And most of all, I honor my fellow nurses on the front lines who inspire with their courage and resilience against all odds.

So, let’s continue to take care of ourselves first, find the time to enjoy our co-workers, and rejoice for the grace and blessings of caring for the sick and the injured. To the new nurses, especially those that I have personally taught in a nurse residency course in my new job, please hang in there. I hope that, many years later, you will look at these memories with fondness in your heart and gratitude for having touched countless lives.

Happy Emergency Nurses Week.